Yesterday, I was in the middle of doing homework with Liam. We do extra math facts after his required work just to keep him sharp. He likes doing it – actually looks forward to it. While he finished up the equations, I gathered his coins from his ‘Clash of Clans’ game. I play too and I know how important it is to get them every now and then. As I was collecting, Liam turned to me and said, “I like having you.”
I actually didn’t understand what he meant at first – so I asked him to explain.
Liam told me that he liked having me around. He liked having me as part of his family. He loved me. He knew that I loved him. He liked… having me.
And that’s when I started to cry. Because – as a mother – you try to do your best. ALWAYS , right? But you never know how you are doing. Is your best good enough? You can only hope so!! And in that moment, Liam verified that everything I was doing was alright. I was a good mom. He felt loved and safe with me and that’s all I ever wanted for my children. It was such a relief.
I know he didn’t mean it this way. I know it was much simpler in his eyes. But it just filled my heart. For the rest of the day, whenever we separated (like when he went on a play date or when he went to sleep), I told him that I liked having him. That’s how I left us off. I think that’s the new way I’m going to say goodbye to him.
I like having you.