Personal Blog

If You Do Something And Don’t Post A Picture Of It On Social Media… Did It Really Happen?

Screen Shot 2015-08-02 at 4.00.06 PM


Scenario 1: “I found a dog in a car and it was really hot out. So, I walked up and down the street until I found the owner and reprimanded him right in front of his friends. That oughta teach him!!”

Scenario 1 response: BRAVO! You are amazing! Good for you! Thank goodness! Great job! I would have done the same thing!

Scenario 2: It feels so good to give to the homeless. I don’t know what that person is going to do with the money, but my soul feels better knowing that I gave him enough for a hot meal tonight.

Scenario 2 response: You are such a great person. The world needs more people like you. Oh my goodness — TEARS!!

Scenario 3 *blogger related only: So bummed I am missing out on this AMAZING TRIP that was just offered to me! But I’m already going to be going to THIS OTHER AMAZING TRIP… because… I AM SO AMAZING!! Too bad I can’t split myself in half and be in two different places at once. Have fun everyone!!

Scenario 3 response: Really? I want your life! You are so lucky! WOW!! How do you get all these trips?! SO COOL! Gosh, I wish I had your LIFE!!!!

Scenario N: Donated 8 bags of clothes to the poor. Feels so good to finally clean out my basement!

Scenario N response: I need to do the same things! Wow! What an accomplishment! You go girl! You are going to make so many people happy! #blessed

Praise. Praise. Praise. Praise. Praise.

It’s all I see. We are living in a praise driven society as of late. Nobody can do anything without getting a virtual pat of the back anymore. And listen, I’m guilty of it too. But I catch myself and I stop myself more times than not. It’s getting to the point where I just want to VOMIT all over my keyboard.

What sparked this most recent upchuck? It was an article that is bringing attention to something that is happening overseas. A billionaire is currently helping out in a small country – which is WONDERFUL – but she’s distributing photos of everything that she is doing along the way.

Now – call me a hypocrite. Call me it. Right now. I deserve it. Want to know why? Because if I took that damn trip, I would be posting those same damn pictures. But there was something really unauthentic about the shot I saw today. She was standing next to two women as they did their everyday routine – and she was mimicking their actions. And I just felt bad about the whole thing. Something sat terribly wrong with my soul. She’s a BILLIONAIRE. She’s not like you or me. I couldn’t change their lives the way this woman could. This woman could – quite literally – pull out her checkbook and CHANGE THEIR LIVES. But instead, she was posing for a photo opp. And it made me depressingly sad.

Bloggers go out into the world on these sort of trips to raise awareness because we don’t have the means to do much more on our own. We are regular people who earn an average living. If I saw a blogger in that shot, I wouldn’t have been offended AT ALL. I would have thought it was great that some press made its way to that area of the world. But seeing a billionaire saunter around and pose for the photo. It just made me sad.

That sparked the flame.

And here we are.

Then I started to think about all of Facebook. The entire thing. My WHOLE feed is just one brag after the other — all about how GREAT people are. I mean, people aren’t patting each other on the back. THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT HOW GREAT THEY – AS INDIVIDUALS – ARE.

It’s ok to have confidence, to have a great day, to knock something out of the park and to own it online. Sure – we all deserve some sunshine. I would never take away all of the light. BUT…. EVERY SINGLE THING YOU DO… I HAVE TO HEAR HOW GREAT IT IS??? And then I have to get every update from every friend that writes about how great you are on my wall … all because of Facebook’s algorithm.

You are amazing!

So lucky!

GO girl!

So blessed!

Omg – I can’t handle it anymore. I really can’t.

And don’t get me started on your KIDS. Please… I’m just not even going to go there. But you know what I’m thinking. Enough. We get it. They are the cutest. The fastest. The strongest. The most talented. Yes… they are going pro. Yes… we all think so.

Where is the truth about life?

How about capturing the real moments of your day? Your child on a swing. You laughing with your husband. A funny quote you heard while walking to work. What about those things? You don’t have to PROVE that you are above all.

Enough with the proving.

Enough with the patting on the back.

Enough with the FILTERS on top of FILTERS. Ladies, we know what you look like in real life!! We actually see you in real life. All those wrinkles that you are filtering away to the point of ridiculousness … it has to stop. Do you know what most people do with those pictures? THEY SCREENSHOT THEM AND SEND THEM TO ME!!!! WITHOUT COMMENT. No comment necessary because it’s all insane.  We can barely make out WHO YOU ARE IN THOSE PHOTOS!! Please stop. Be you. Just be you.

Maybe if we all stopped trying to prove that we are good people and just LITERALLY spent all that time and energy on becoming good people instead, society would be in a better place. Now if you’ll excuse me… I have to go on Facebook to write about how I just unloaded so much heavy on my blog and how I feel 10 pounds lighter.

</ rant>

Vera Sweeney, mom, blogger, social media influencer and New York resident, is the founder of She is considered one of the top female digital influencers in today’s social media space. Her lifestyle and parenting brand helps busy women stay on top of the latest trends in fashion, food, family and travel.